When My 4-Year-Old Child’s Middle Finger Made Me Uncomfortable

mom peeping into daughter's phone, shocked

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The lockdown is going on, and it’s difficult for my 3-year-old daughter to stay away from video calling. So, one day she was on a video call with one of her cousin who is just 6 months elder to her. Both of them were having a great time showing toys to each other. I was busy doing some work when suddenly my daughter said, “Maa, what does didi mean by showing that one big finger?” Her question caught my attention, and I saw her showing her middle finger. I was shocked.

My brother in law, her father was right beside her, and he was smiling despite watching all of it. He didn’t utter a single word. I disconnected the call and told my daughter it’s bad manners to show that finger. It’s a bad sign. I later thought, a 4-year-old child showing the middle finger is not the fault of the child. It is, in fact, the fault of the people surrounding the child. What type of environment are they giving to the child? Why couldn’t they stop her when she was showing that finger?

I agree that we need to teach everything to our children, but does this mean we teach them such things or don’t stop them if they learn it from somewhere else? It will be our children’s choice to become what they want to when they grow up, but that does not mean we should let them learn everything. We know all of us are going to die one day. Then, do we teach our children to die now? No. Never. So, why are we teaching them indecent things or don’t stop them when we find them doing something unacceptable? I am wondering, where are we heading? I have met many parents who think it’s cool if their children use obscene hand gestures or words/slangs, but is this really cool? I am wondering how to protect my daughter from this.

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