“Log kya kahenge (what will people say). Look at others; they perform better than you. You are good for nothing. What will relatives and friends think about you? Your friend/siblings do so well”. These are the common statements we tell our children.
What a big mistake we do by stating such negative terms to our children. Our little children are new to this world. They are here to explore, experiment and learn. These inquisitive minds will make mistakes and learn. But oh, we parents want our children to be perfect from day 1.
– We do not want them to litter the house, though we may litter our own kitchen.
– We do not want them to wet the bed.
– We want them to be 1st or at least be quick learners even when we take our own sweet time and have our choice if we want to learn something or not. I am not fond of being in the kitchen.
– We want them to compete with others whether they understand it or not, but we cannot hear a word against ourselves. I do not like to hear about my kitchen skills.
– We want them to be at their best behaviour with everyone, while we, the parents, can have mood swings. I do have lots of mood swings with an increased workload.
– We want our children to be best at studies and extracurricular activities, but I know for myself, I am not best at everything.
Yes, even I am one of those mothers who want their child to be the best and not lag behind in this competitive world. But, I do understand for now that my child will grow up and have his own interests and hobbies which he will excel at.
We, as parents, do not have to force our children to do what is not of interest to them. If you remember, during our childhood years, we played with our friends without any competition, and our parents did not interfere. We should aim to be like our parents and let the children grow at their own pace without pressurising them to do the best at everything.
I promise I will try to encourage and not pressurise. Do you promise?
Lots of love to all the parents out there.
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