8 Things You Lose As a Working Mom, and 8 Things You Gain
As a working mom, irrespective of how old your child becomes – you win some, you lose some. Here are 8 ups and downs about being a working parent in today’s world.
Women are at par with men in almost every field in today’s world. There isn’t one profession where women have not made a mark – astronomy, medical science, civil services, law, economics, trade, business,
banking and finance, fine arts… women are everywhere. While this is indeed something worth celebrating, there is a big pay-off that women have had to pay in exchange of their career and professional growth – time away from kids.
Life and Struggles of a Working Mother
“That is my work, my sweat, and my time away from my kids! If that is not personal, I don’t know what is!” – Erin Brockovich
Here are 8 aspects of a mother’s life that get affected when she chooses to become a working mom. You win some, you lose some, but we know, and so do you – that you wouldn’t have it any other way.
They lose time with their kids – precious time that they are probably never going to get back.
They gain time for their career – time that allows them to focus on their job and ace it.
The biggest struggle for a working mother is that of striking a proper work-life balance that allows her to have enough time with her children, her family, and enough time for herself, without falling behind or lagging in her job or carer as compared to her colleagues.
They lose good health for themselves – as work and family keeps pulling them in opposite directions, health almost always suffers.
They gain confidence and self-worth – which definitely does wonders for their self-respect, and in turn their mental health.
The tight-rope walk that most working moms try hard to do, often ends up with them compromising on their health – especially the food they eat. However, working at par other men and women, and knowing their self-worth surely serves as a healthy boost to their self-esteem and confidence. And a healthy mind is the first step to a happy life.
They lose their control of the kitchen – as most of them employ maids to cook for them.
They gain more time to spend with their children – as one of the biggest ‘chores’ of the house is taken care of by someone else.
Let’s face it – one of the biggest duties or jobs of being a mother and a wife is to ensure your family gets nutritious and healthy food to eat. However, it is also one of the most time-consuming ‘chores’ around the house… which is why many working moms prefer hiring a maid to cook for them. This means the kitchen is going to be reorganised, you are never going to find things where you left them (or when you need them), and there is probably going to be too much oil in the sabzi! But all that freed up time definitely means more time to spend with the children – and one mammoth task off your shoulders!
4. The House
They lose control over how their house is maintained – as there may not be enough time to do things around the house and keep it as neat and clean as they would wish to.
They gain the ability to contribute towards stability of the house – by taking on part of the financial responsibility of the house.
A lot goes into keeping a house neat and tidy, clean, and in proper order. However, working moms may not be able to give as much of their time towards this seemingly trivial but equally important aspect of running a family. On the other hand, the fact that they are contributing toward financial stability of the same house must definitely bring peace to their minds – and a sense of achievement and pride too.
They lose the liberty of the afternoon siesta – because you cannot possibly sleep in the middle of a meeting!
They gain the liberty to go to bed on time at night – because you cannot possibly stay awake beyond a certain hour after you have been on your toes the whole day.
The day of a stay-at-home mom gets a well-deserved and required ‘pause’ in the afternoon, where she may have an hour or two to rest a bit. Not for a working mom though! However, the upside of losing the beloved afternoon siesta is that you can go to bed early, with your children. There is no way you can stay awake beyond 10 or 11 after having been on your toes the whole day. You can retire early to bed, and get (or at least try to get) undisturbed 7 hour sleep before you get ready to take on the world again!
They lose friends – because after giving time to their work, family, and themselves, there is hardly any time left to maintain friendships.
They gain friends – in the form of colleagues!
Friends are your family away from family. They are the first relationship that you forge outside of your family, and come to mean a lot to you through the different stages of life. However, as other things take on higher positions in your list of priorities, friendships take a back-seat. Many working moms will admit that they haven’t seen their best friend from school or even college in a long time. But their work place sure offers a lot of potential for new friendships to be formed.
They lose their say in their child’s upbringing – as they have to rely on other family members to look after their child, who may teach the child things that the mother doesn’t necessarily agree with.
They gain the chance to instil great values in their children – by making an example of their own lives.
A mother may not necessarily want to give her child too many chocolates. She may not want for her child to watch so much TV. She may wish for her child to read more books. While a stay-at-home mom can personally look into all these minute aspects of bringing up her child, a working mom may not have the liberty to do so. However, by being independent, self-sufficient, and dedicated to her work, she can definitely set a fine example for her children – a role model for them to aspire to.
8. Special Moments
They lose being a witness to their child’s achievements – because your child may just choose to walk or talk while you are attending a conference call in office!
They gain a lot of special moments at office – that come in the form of achievements, recognition, and awards.
The first time her baby walks, the first time the baby says ‘mumma’ are special moments for sure. Your child’s first gold star on his homework, his first medal in the school race, are important milestones of the child that a working mom may have to forego. However, for every lost special moment, she is creating milestones and pitching flags in the outside world.
There is so much that women do for every single person in their life. It is certainly not an easy choice to make, and we raise our glasses to all the working moms out there – salute! You indeed run the world… after all, mum’s the world!