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Is your little one giving you a lot of trouble lately by acting all aggressive, violent and destructive? Well, before you scold or punish your child, it is essential for you to understand why your child is behaving in this manner. Children do not know what is right or wrong, in other words, they are not born with good behaviour or bad behaviour. Instead, they learn their behavioural traits from their surroundings or by observing people around them. Let us find out in detail why children have destructive behaviour and what you can do as a parent to correct it, in this post.
Do You Have a Destructive Toddler?
Occasional stomping on toys, throwing their stuff around in anger or pulling their hair can be considered a normal part of growing up and all children engage in such behavioural traits once in a while. However, if your child is exhibiting some of the following behavioural characteristics on a regular basis, it could be indicative of destructive behaviour
In most cases, suppressed hostility usually turns into deadly action. Aggression can be both physical and verbal and often, children engage in this kind of behaviour to gain their parent’s attention. Also, the severity can be established from the age of the child. For instance, a toddler snatching things from other children and exhibiting tantrums may be considered normal, but the same behaviour by an older child may be an indication of some serious issue.
Children with negative behavioural traits may deliberately harm themselves by burning, cutting or hitting themselves. You may find them involved in activities that may include inflicting self-hurt and pain. This may be due to some hidden or suppressed anger, depression, fear, sadness or frustration.
3. Disruptive Nature
You may often find such children showing disturbing nature, which means they may interfere with other people’s jobs and thus make it more difficult for them. For example, the child may not listen to the teacher, he may break the rules in school, or he may not obey elders. Such children may be trying to gain attention, but it may not be in proper or acceptable ways.
4. Property Destruction
Sometimes a child may act nasty and start breaking or destructing things around them. The child may show no regard towards anyone’s feelings and no fear of the consequences of such actions. The reason for this kind of nature is usually anger, frustration or other negative emotions.
What Causes Destructive Behaviour in a Child?
It is not a pleasant sight for the parents to see their child turn into a diabolical being. However, parents need to understand that the child is doing so because he may be seeking attention or affection from the parents. Sometimes such behavioural traits come into light when a child may want to evade a particular chore or situation. For example, a child may deliberately break his pencil so that is unable to do his homework or he may purposely spoil his party-clothes so that he may get punished, which would eventually mean skipping the event that he does not wish to attend.
How to Stop Destructive Behaviour in Toddlers?
Here are some ways of stopping children’s destructive behaviour
1. Try To Understand Your Child
No two children are alike, not even siblings. Therefore, as parents, you need to understand and appreciate your child’s unique personality and needs. Be a part of your child’s life and learn more about him. Find out what he did in school, what bothers him or interests him.
2. Prevention Should Be The Aim
If your child shows such personality traits, punishing and scolding will not help instead it may further worsen the situation. The best way to put a stop to such behaviour is to prevent it. Keep an eye on him or keep him under observation. If he starts any mischief, you may intrude and talk to him or spend time with him.
3. Make A Routine For The Child
It will be a great idea to keep your child engrossed and occupied in doing something constructive or keeping him fruitfully busy. Children who follow routines are less likely to become destructive in comparison to kids who do not support any routine.
4. Pamper But Don’t Spoil
We all love and adore our children but giving in to all their demands and agreeing to whatever they say, may make them spoilt. And it is very easy for spoilt children to turn destructive. You should aim at teaching your child to be well-behaved and disciplined.
5. Nurture Your Child’s Individuality
If your child is more active than other children, you should not sulk or crib about it; instead, you should plan for activities that may help in positively channelising your child’s energies.
6. Keep Encouraging Good Behaviour
When destructive toddler tantrums become a regular phenomenon, you may feel, and tired reinforce good behaviour. However, do not forget that if you feel discouraged, your kid may feel discouraged too. Keep showing him with your love and at the same time encourage good behaviour in your child.
If any of the resorts mentioned above do not prove to be of any help, you may go in for professional advice. Sometimes taking parenting classes may prove to be helpful too. Whatever may be your call, however, do not give up on your child and help your child overcome this behavioural trait.