Using discipline to inculcate good behaviour is an important part of parenting. Parenting is a constant struggle and parents need to use a broad range of strategies and methods to help children imbibe good behaviour and alter behaviour when it is less than perfect. It is important to mould and be flexible in your ways to shape your child’s behaviour. The methods you use must be in line with contemporary learning and child care methods. Gone are those days when you could just give a tight slap to your child and get them on track. Well, it is time you accepted that you have to spare the rod yet not spoil the child. Children do not have multitasking abilities nor do they have the maturity to comprehend things and understand the magnitude of their actions. It is important to get down and connect at their level rather than compete for attention. Read on to find out what are the best ways to reverse your child’s behaviour.
10 Effective Tips to Get Children to Behave
Raising well-behaved children has become an arduous task for most parents of today. Parents have a busy lifestyle and find it hard to balance their personal and professional commitments. A hectic work culture leads to less time being spent with children and very little time to sit and interact with them to stress the importance of developing a strong character for a secure future.
How to get children to behave? Why does my son not behave appropriately around people? How to teach a child to behave in a school? These are few glaring questions that parents dart at child psychologists. Well, it is not rocket science to get kids to behave well and neither does one need to visit a doctor unless the situation is out of control. The tips below will help you discipline your child and behave in an impeccable fashion at all times. You could also win some brownie points for being a great parent!
1. Use an Assertive Tone
Never yell, shout or scream when you have to make a point. It is important to be assertive and stress the importance of the matter. It will immediately get their attention.
2. Acknowledge their Feelings
It is very important to accept their feelings and not disregard them. For example: if your kid is angry if you have taken his toy then give an explanation for your action. Don’t try to ignore them or calm them down.
3. Use Motivation
A reward chart works wonders when disciplining your kid. Invest in one and have stickers handy to highlight good behaviour. Sell the idea of behaving well with an incentive that will be received on gaining a certain number of points.
4. Change the Concept of Discipline
The word discipline originates from the Latin word “to teach”. Ditch punishment for reiterating the importance of good behaviour. Keep using reassuring words and motivational gestures to induce good behaviour. Model yourself on the same line for them to follow.
5. Give Options
Explain to your child that good behaviour will fetch them a reward and appreciation, however, bad behaviour will only lead to time in the naughty corner. Ask them what they would prefer. This gives them time to think and decide what they want. It also empowers them to distinguish between right and wrong and follow that principle always.
6. Offer Feedback
Never fail to respond or acknowledge their actions. If your boy has been good at tidying up their room, then make sure you say “Thank You”, “What a wonderful display of a sense of responsibility”. Positive words feel good to their ears and they have a sense of accomplishment.
7. Reorganise your Thoughts
Try to understand that your child is not being hard or difficult on purpose. They just don’t understand the importance of it all. So instead of saying, “You are behaving very badly lately” trying telling them “You seem to be having a hard time. Is there anything I can do to help?”. Remember that your child is struggling to express themselves and only you hold the key to help them vent their feelings.
8. Teaching Gratitude
A very important attitude to be taught to kids today who have lost touch with personal connections with the influence of technology. The best way to teach them to grateful is to set a small prayer routine either in the morning or at bedtime, thanking the Almighty for what you have. This will automatically filter through other aspects of life and every occasion- be it a birthday party, wedding or even in school.
9. Send Gentle Warnings
Don’t make any abrupt endings to anything that your kids do. Kids hate it when they are not given a prior warning of what is coming up. For example, if you want them to stop watching TV, then give a “5-minute warning” signal before it is time to switch off. This way they will be mentally prepared for what they can expect.
10. Practice Yoga or Meditation
Yoga and meditation exercises have been proven remedies to tackle stress in adults. They have amazing benefits for kids when practised on a regular basis. Engage your kids in meditation or yoga asanas (tree pose, child pose) to calm their senses. By practising yoga and meditation, kids especially ones with special needs develop a composed mind and thereby adopt a calm approach to dealing with any situation.
There is no proven technique to inspire good behaviour which will weave its magic like a wand on your kid. The most important thing is to lead by example. Let your child see how you care for people around you, hear the kind words you use and see you doing your duty irrespective of being told. This alone will suffice to enthuse an empathetic behaviour at home and school. Build your repertoire of techniques, tools, methods and language to motivate good behaviour and gain maximum cooperation from your kids. Ditch the drama and bring in engaging dialogues and discussions to strike that healthy balance.