I always wanted to be a mother. I know it sounds a bit weird. Most people of my age and of my generation would be surprised to hear this, but this was the truth. I actually planned my career and my life around my baby, umm my future baby.
Now, I am a mother to a beautiful girl. And we are doing really good. My little girl is fine and I am very good with her. But I have a problem with society’s expectations, my husband and family’s expectations, and my own expectations! I keep trying to prove them and to myself that I am a good mother. The expectations that I have from my husband are never fulfilled.
My friends and some people judge me for undergoing a c-section delivery. I did not plan it and the doctor had to do an emergency C-section. My amniotic fluid was leaking and my baby was in danger, so there was no option but to perform a c-section. But my peers still judge me.
As per my mother and mother-in-law, I am never right. For instance, if I say “please don’t put kajal in her eyes.” They say, “You people read 2 books and you think that you know more than us.” The fact is sometimes, I do know more than them.
My husband is very nice. He loves me and my baby a lot. But he is rarely there for us. A few things never come to him naturally, like sitting with me, having dinner with me, looking after me, or saying a few romantic words to me. I know he is not romantic and doesn’t know how to comfort anyone, but once in a while he can hold me and hug me. I have become self-conscious now and I feel hearing a few positive words would help me. As per everyone, especially my mother-in-law, my girl is like her father but if she does something wrong, then they say that she is like me. She is just two-months-old. All she knows is to eat sleep, poop, and repeat, but still, people know how to find faults.
Being a mother is not easy. A mom’s life becomes even more difficult when there are so many people finding faults in her. I just want to say that don’t make it so difficult for a mom. Let her learn and let her live!
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