Breastfeeding – The Most Difficult Task in My Life, But I Finally Achieved It!

By Radhika Sharma - Updated: August 23, 2021

It was on 11th April when my first child, who was a girl, came into this world. She is a premature baby born in 34 weeks as she had difficulty in breathing and also had jaundice by birth. She was admitted immediately to the NICU and was not put on my breast even once. She was formula fed and on the other hand, my breasts got filled with milk and I could not feed her and because of which I got a fever and the doctor advised me to breastfeed immediately.
I went to the hospital to feed her but she was blindfolded and had wires everywhere on her body. She was not able to feed on my breast as she didn’t know how to do it. My breast had a heavy flow of milk but I was unable to feed her. I had a caesarian section, and so I could not sit for long. So the doctor advised me to pump my milk and send it to the hospital and the staff would feed her.
This made my work easy but I didn’t know that this procedure would affect my child in such a way that she would only drink pumped milk and would not suck on my breast. I would pump every four hours because once I pumped, she would drink it twice i.e. every two hours. As a newborn, she would drink 30ml once and as she grew up, she would drink 60ml. I would have to pump every four hours in order to meet her demand. All day, I would be washing her bottle and breast pump accessories. This took me to depression and I had to take anti-depression pills because I would worry about her getting up from her sleep and me pumping again. Also what if my milk supply is not good? How will I be able to feed her? These thoughts took me to depression. One day I could not pump even 30ml of milk. because of the lack of milk supply. So I gave her formula milk and she could not digest it and kept vomiting and she did not drink even my milk for six hours. This was also one reason for depression. The doctor advised me to go to my home for some days for a changeover and gave me lactonic granules powder for a better milk supply. With the help of that powder, my milk supply increased and I went to my home. My mother helped me with breastfeeding. She taught me and also my baby how to feed. I pumped for three months, but now she will be four and she has learnt how to suck and now she is only on breastfeeding. Now I pump only once at night so that she is full and asleep for long in the night. I had to go through a lot while feeding.
It is not an easy task, but for a baby, breastfeeding is the best and every mother should breastfeed. Give formula milk only if you are unable to breastfeed.

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