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Having a single child in the family seems relatively easy, two make for good company but three- it might turn into your worst nightmare. Or maybe it won’t. “Should I have a 3rd baby?” is what you may be thinking.
But if you’re curious and want to know what it feels like, we have you covered. Let’s delve into the pros and cons as we explore some of the lifestyle changes you’ll get to experience after you welcome that third member. Here’s to having a third at child at 35 and beyond.
What Life Changes Can You Anticipate Once You will Have a Third Child?
Your whole world changes when you have a third baby. Okay, we don’t want to sound so dramatic, but yes – you’ll have more responsibilities. Have a third baby or not, here’s what you can expect with three or more kids in the house:
1. You Have More Household Chores
From doing the dishes to laundry, grocery shopping, and cleaning the house, your household chores rack up in the numbers department. Having a third child is like signing up for a Spartan Warrior Bootcamp and hey – it’s not easy.
2. Your Kids Get More Attention
If you’re young parents and are thinking of having a third child, here’s the newsflash – you may go outside the picture. Not kidding. If your other two children are young and your third one is at the age of 5 or below, you’ll have to give the younger one more attention. And the other two may notice that and want a piece each too.
3. Movie Nights Aren’t The Same
Have two kids fought out on which movie to watch? Your third child will be their tie-breaker and help decide what title gets played.
4. Your House Gets Noisy
If your younger kids are quiet or shy, you might have it easy. But sometimes having a third child may throw things out of the loop and be bustling with excitement. This means more noises, crying, screaming, and head-scratching. But it also means you get your equal shares of smiles, laughter, and those adorable faces that make hearts melt.
5. More Food, More Supplies
It’s pretty obvious. Having a third kid in the house equals more food and more supplies. This also means financially you might get a bit tight if you haven’t planned it out. Look at your finances and see if you can afford to have another child in the house. We’re not mean, just realistic. The economy you live in matters too – if you have a third child in India, it might be cheaper than having one in places like US or UK.
6. Asking for Help
Having a third kid to take care of equals more responsibility. The most significant lifestyle change would be asking for help. Sometimes parents find it challenging to juggle responsibilities and hesitate to ask for help when things go awry. But you’ll find yourself not waiting and will ask for help from family and friends. It’s just life.
7. Added Responsibility
Having a third child does equal more responsibility or an increase in it. You’re literally caring for, sheltering, and feeding another human being. You’ll find yourself budgeting more aggressively too and being mindful of the things you spend money on. For example, you might cut out cable and use the internet for shows instead of blowing money there. Or you may realise saying goodbye to that Netflix subscription you never use.
8. Time Crunches
Yes. Your life will be busy. If you’ve been getting a lot of free time in your hands, you won’t find that to be the case after your third. You’ll find your personal time slipping away and your clock ticking. But it’s not always the case when you have friends and relatives for the added support.
What are the Pros of Having the Third Baby?
Here are a few pros of having a third baby:
1. There’s Energy in The House
If your home is waning or seeming a bit too quiet with just two kids, having a third one may just do the trick. Sometimes this energy becomes infectious, and life goes from dull to fun. Moms can vouch for this one.
2. Your House Stays Guarded
When you teach your kids to trust each other and watch their backs, you’ll find that your kids take care of each other and stay close. There’s a close bond that forms and your house feels protected. You’ll notice the siblings supervising and watching the younger ones back and vice versa.
3. More Pizza Nights
Because, hey – who doesn’t love pizza? We’re serious about this. And ordering one pie won’t cut it, you’ll actually need four to five pies because it’ll be a feast.
4. You Share Responsibility
Yes, it does get busy in the initial years, but once your kids start understanding and grow older, like around seven to ten, they might ask for more responsibilities. We’ve seen four-year-olds folding clothes and seven-year-olds taking out the trash. So yes, your work does get cut out a bit, not only as a bonus side effect. This pro isn’t always the case for every household though.
5. You Have More Fun
The more, the merrier, they say: it’s right in this case. You’ll have a lot of fun when it comes to visiting amusement parks, eating out, and celebrating birthday parties in style. Plus, your kids never feel lonely, and you don’t have to hunt for playdates since they’re like friends in the house. It’s a cool lifestyle once you make it work.
What Are The Cons of Having the Third Baby?
Everything’s not glittery or sunshine and rainbows when it comes to having a third baby. Here are some of the downsides or cons of it:
1. You Don’t Get Time for Self-Care
If you get busy attending to a gassy baby or finding out that young ones need more pasta ASAP, you won’t get the me-time you want. Self-care is essential since you want to exercise, meditate and stay your very best day by day. But sometimes life gets in the way, and you won’t be able to make the time for that.
You might even have even to stop working and put in more hours for mom time, in some cases. But being a stay-at-home mom (or dad) and looking after your kids isn’t something some parents prefer but it’s a sacrifice that turns into a necessity.
2. Your Sleep Schedules Goes Out of the Window
Yes, it does. If you have a third child screaming at 2 am asking for more food – guess who’s going to do that? It’s parenting 101 but taken to another stage. Get ready to take more naps and say goodbye to long hours of snoozes.
3. It Gets More Stressful
According to a Mom Survey at Today, research says that having a third child is more stressful than two or four. Because of science. And if you like numbers, you’re welcome.
What sort of stress? Siblings fighting, maybe kids receiving complaints from school and the endless parent-teacher meetings. Also, you’ll have to pack their lunches and keep tabs on if they come back on time before curfew (depending on where you live).
4. Lack of Homely Space
This isn’t the case with every household but if your apartment is cramped up or if you’ve got less room, having a third kid might be a bad idea. Kids love space, the freedom to move and do things the way they want. Don’t give them that because you’re financially tight and they won’t understand.
Because kids will be kids and that’s how it is.
5. Sharing Stuff
If you love to go out shopping with your kids, you’ll find that you can’t hold three hands. It does feel sad, but one of your kids will have to compromise. The same goes for video games. Your kids may fight over who gets to play the videogame, and you might witness some home wars in action. But don’t worry, it’s fun. Especially if you like pillow fights.
They say having a third child can change your life, and although we believe that’s true, we certainly don’t believe in falling for the hype. Having a third child will give you more responsibility and joy, in odd proportions. But it’s about what works for you and your partner.
If you feel you have what it takes to take life on ahead, then go for it. Otherwise, be happy with two kids for now and bring up the subject later when the time is ripe. That’s all we have to say or our three favourite words: keep it realistic.