How to Deal with Spoiled Brat

A mother shouting at her daughter at a candy store

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Dealing with a spoilt brat requires patience. We’re talking about a child whose entire attitude and behaviour is difficult, and this is not something that you can change overnight. If your child is spoilt, then you need to first figure out what the signs are, and which approach works best while dealing with the kid.

What is Spoiled Child?

An angry child

Has your child been throwing too many tantrums of late? Maybe he or she has been whining way too much, and if you don’t adhere to the child’s demands -hell breaks loose. Naughty children are fun and cute, but there’s only so much a parent or any adult can put up with.

Raising a spoiled child is hard because this is your own little munchkin we’re talking about. But you know how the saying goes – spare the rod and spoil the child. On that note, beating your child is out of the question too. When we say “spare the rod”, we don’t mean it literally. Using positive reinforcements work wonders and understanding the child in the first place is essential too.

Reasons why Children get Spoiled?

A lot of parents wonder how an angelic child can turn into a spawn of Satan, but you’ll be surprised to know that most of these kids are spoilt, thanks to their parents. Upbringing plays a big role in the behaviour of a child. Here are a few reasons that could be the causal factors of your child being spoiled –

  1. Pampering:

“I WANT IT, AND I WANT IT NOW!!’ Parents these days confuse pampering with spoiling. Giving your child everything he or she asks, and immediately, gives that child the impression that you are entitled to do as per the child’s demands. As this keeps going on, you’ll see that the child ends up having no gratitude for everything you do either.

2. Compensating Parents:

Children are materialistic, but if your child’s entire world revolves around this, then something doesn’t really add up. Parents are usually caught up with work, so making up for lost quality time with your kids by giving them materialistic goodies is extremely common – and wrong. A lot of parents give their kids money like its nobody’s business, and this can work against you, when you see that the child begins to think that he or she will and should get whatever, whenever and however. Giving your child financial liberty is one of the first and biggest reasons why your child is getting spoiled.

3. Friend Circle: 

The kind of friends your child hangs with can be one of the reasons why your child is getting spoiled. Children get highly influenced, and if your child’s friends are spoilt, there are chances that your child is watching and learning from there. Sometimes, kids behave like their friends to fit in, and at other times, they do so because if their friends have it their way, why not themselves?

4. Overprotective Parents:

Overprotective parents are not the best parents. As much as you hate it, sometimes, you need to let go. If you’ve been throwing too many restrictions on your kid, the chances are that he or she will rebel and turn out to be a spoiled brat. Kids who are controlled and restricted too much will develop an unhealthy attitude owing to all that pent up frustration and anger.

5. Violent Parenting:

Physical violence is a strict no when handling kids, and this is something that you should remember at all times, especially on those days where your little one is troubling you so much, that all you want to do is whack the living daylights off him or her. Hurting a child physically will give your child the idea that he or she can hit others and it’s okay to do so. It will also result in your child harbouring a lot of negativity and frustration.

6. Pliable Parents:

Saying yes to your child every time is a strict no. A lot of parents give in to their child’s demands because who wants to deal with a noisy tantrum all the time, right? But if you keep doing this, you’ll be facing a bigger problem where your child has turned into a spoiled brat that is beyond redemption.

7. Poor Manners:

Not teaching your child good manners and basic courtesy is another reason why your child is spoiled.

Signs you’re Raising a Spoiled Brat

Here are a few signs of a spoiled child –

  1. Temper Tantrums:

The child is frequently throwing temper tantrums, irrespective of whether it is at home or in public.

  1. Disrespectful:

When your child does not show any respect for you or any other adult.

  1. Unhelpful:

If your child refuses to help you, even if you ask for a hand.

  1. Unsatisfied:

No matter what you give, it is never enough, and your child is never satisfied.

  1. Possessive:

If your child doesn’t share, then you should know that your child is just a brat. It’s okay for kids to get possessive about their toys or food once in a while, but if the child does this every time, then the child really needs some lessons in kindness and sharing.

  1. Rude:

When your child blatantly ignores you when you’re talking.

  1. Ungrateful:

If your child shows no gratitude or appreciation. A simple “Thank you” is the least they can give, but if all you’re getting is a snobbish attitude, then spoilt brat is what your child is.

  1. Manipulative:

Creates elaborate lies to gain something without putting the requisite effort. For example, saying they finished their homework just so that they can go out and play.

Effects of Spoiling a Child

It is completely understandable that as a parent, you want to give your child the world. But you need to know that sometimes, this can work against you, as well as your child. If you’re spoiling your child, you need to stop, because if you don’t, here’s what happens –

  • The child will turn out to be disrespectful to everyone around him or her.
  • The child will find it hard to deal with relationships.
  • As the child grown, he or she will lose too many friends along the way.
  • Spoiled children turn out to be lazy.
  • Children who are spoiled turn out to be extremely materialistic.
  • A lot of spoiled children turn out to be irresponsible adults.
  • Spoiled kids find it hard to deal or work in a group.
  • Nobody likes spoiled kids, and when these kids turn out to be spoiled adults, that’s a different ball game altogether, because if nobody likes spoiled kids, spoiled adults – no one can stand.

How can you Deal with Spoiled Children?

If your child is spoiled, you need to deal with your child in an approach that is helpful. Here’s how not to spoil a child

  • Make sure child understand that no one likes a spoiled child and that it is very unfair when you’re at the receiving end.
  • Try positive reinforcements instead of negatives. Be kind and gentle, and your child will learn from you.
  • Set down house rules, and make sure your child follows them. If the child doesn’t, make sure there are consequences that will have to be faced.
  • Make sure your emotions are not all over the place. Put up a calm front when dealing with your child.
  • Make sure you acknowledge any good behaviour too. If bad behaviour needs punishment, then good behaviour needs rewards. This will encourage your child to be a better person.
  • Learn to say no when you absolutely must
  • Stop giving your child materialistic goods in place of quality time and love.
  • Don’t be overly restrictive and overprotective
  • Teach your child the virtue of patience.

It’s not easy to correct your child’s behaviour, but you should do so before it gets too late.

Children are not easy to handle, especially a spoiled child, but with a lot of patience and understanding, you can tackle a child well.