It’s Us vs. the Problem – We’re Both on the Same Side

As a couple, we’ve argued and had disagreements on several occasions. A lot of times, we have forgotten where or how the whole thing even started. But, each argument has made us come closer together, and made us stronger than before. There is one such instance that comes to mind. This has defined us as a couple in our four years of marriage.

We’d been married for about two happy years as an inter-religious couple. There was a day that had started off as average, and we ended up in an argument about something tiny. Unfortunately, like most couples, we decided to each hold our ground, and pride took the best of us. I know that I personally hated the negativity, but wasn’t ready to be the first one to talk.

That night, we both went to bed angry with each other. As was my daily ritual, more out of habit than anything else, I took my husband’s left arm and stretched it out, much like I did every night. Then, I remembered I was supposed to be angry with him. I felt awkward immediately, even annoyed at myself for being ‘weak’.

My husband, on the other hand, found that little habit so precious that he crumbled and burst out laughing. He thought it was sweet that I would momentarily forget our argument to do something that had become our ritual now. The ice broke instantly, and we talked our differences away that night.

The next morning, I woke up happy, and realized something really important. He wasn’t the problem. Nor was I. It was me and him vs. the problem.

How did this define our marriage? Our arguments have never been the same again. We are more respectful and logical towards our problems, and we surprise ourselves each time we do. We can’t not have differences, but we can certainly tackle our differences better. This is our formula, our little invention.

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