HomeQuestions & Answers#asktheexpert what do I do for my 3 year old kid to start having food by choice and not by force
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#asktheexpert what do I do for my 3 year old kid to start having food by choice and not by force
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A. Apart from some really nice suggestions already available, I will just tell you what I am going through. My son is 5 and a 1/2 years old.
I make reasonably healthy and tasty food. So, usually it is not a problem with taste.
I only give food at specified timings. Though I prefer giving him nuts & fruits/dried fruits every now and then (whenever I feel he had his food an hour ago and can a few nuts) I don't give solid food apart from specified timings.
I have made him eat his food on his own 3 months ago. Earlier to that, I used to help him eat. Now, he is on his own, no matter how long it takes
Initially, it was very tough. Some were easy for him to pick and eat, so, he used to eat quick. Some were difficult for his small hands. I had to instruct him on how to pick food with his hands. He had no interest in learning them. He thought I would help him if he is sitting with food and asking for help. I insisted on eating fully on his own. Yes, two things, first he should eat on his own. Second, eating fully, clean plate rule. At times, he hardly at 4 to 5 spoons. If I had to go out after his lunch, I used to start giving him half an hour before, still he would have not completed, I close the remaining with a lid and go out. After coming back, ask him to eat the same food. Though it is neither pleasant to me nor for him, he needed to know that he can't get away without eating. He had times when he felt hungry when we were outside when he didn't eat properly at home. I had to leave him starve, so that he will eat the remaining food at home :-(As one of them mentioned, TV time after food, also works. I know, it is bad practice to bribe them to do their duty. But, initially, he may need it. Otherwise, you can encourage him with words and actions, like clapping your hands once he is done with his food (initially be it part of his food). Tell him I am very happy that you completed eating your food (even if he didn't complete, see if he has taken efforts in eating, tell him that you are happy for all his efforts - don't tell him that you are happy when you are not. Tell him which part made you happy - for that you need to be really happy for his efforts too - though there is no much result). My son nowadays wanted to hear me saying that "I am very happy to see clean plate" - He is not even okay with the word "yes, I am happy" - that is the level they needs motivation. I make sure that I say whether I am upset, happy or very happy as I feel it and why I feel so.
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