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We are aware that parenting is a world full of unexpected moments of bliss. We are all pretty sure of becoming a good parent until we have kids and give sub-optimal responses. We are all in this, together.
The decision of lashing out at our kids lies in our hands. Our coping mechanisms are very limited, not denying the fact that preschoolers have the ability to push us to the edge of our patience. There are some natural triggers as well with kids, like hunger and tiredness. Different personalities require different reactions from parents for similar actions. Some kids need to be empowered, and some need power. Some kids prefer noisy environment while some prefer a quiet atmosphere. Preschoolers also need parents for a designated period of time for playing.
When parents control kids by displaying anger when they misbehave, they damage them in unimaginable ways. Therefore, praise and attention are all they need, even more than toys.
The best response can sometimes be a fabricated response too. The daily conversations of “do this” and “don’t do this” with our tiny adults can be replaced by offering them choices. Parents need to avoid belittling them too with words and the tone of their voice.
Also, adapting depends on the environment you have at home. If things are not going the way they should be, parents must try to change the environment and make it appropriate for the child. Sometimes, however, the child also needs to be taught to adjust to a certain environment.
Every single one of us is a kid to someone, and every single parent has expectations from their children. How a kid should look and behave is one of the greatest expectations parents face these days. Kids have an amazing capacity for growth and change. We are more worried about our own credentials rather than the kids. Your kid’s expectations and choices are different too.
Each one of us has emotions and can experience anxiety and guilt. We just need to avoid being engulfed by these emotions. Staying mad and acting out at kids over something so inconsequential that you don’t remember the details later isn’t worth anything. Become an observer sometimes and realise the pattern of your kid’s behaviour. Forgive as well as apologise. Also, resenting your kids for something they had done a long time ago is utterly pointless.
Kids are reluctant to give up any task because they don’t fear failure. Also, goals are achievable in an optimal environment. The academic success of children is also related to the home environment and parents’ involvement with them. The happiness that comes from joyful childhood experiences is everlasting.
Kids need kindness every single day. Let your child enjoy everything without worrying. Hug, love and kiss him/her as a reward. Let every minute count.
Luckily, most of us learn through experience. We mature at different paces. Don’t be scared to mess up. Everyone makes mistakes; some are just better at hiding them than others. We all must have gone through countless blogs and books on parenting, but we face the same conflict at some point. Whatever works for your child now, won’t work in the future. None of us has answers, but all of us become older and wiser eventually.
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