Hello Doctors,

I am a father of a one year old girl child. Recently, i was not able to spend enough time with my kid, since I got transferred to a different location. Now whenever I go home, i know my baby is obviously excited but I feel like my kid is more attached to my wife's mother than me , I feel like I am her 3rd favourite person in the world. It doesn't matter how much time I spend with my kid , I am not getting enough of it. I am too much worried that she will not get that much attached with me . Anything I can do about it

Question

Hello Doctors,

I am a father of a one year old girl child. Recently, i was not able to spend enough time with my kid, since I got transferred to a different location. Now whenever I go home, i know my baby is obviously excited but I feel like my kid is more attached to my wife's mother than me , I feel like I am her 3rd favourite person in the world. It doesn't matter how much time I spend with my kid , I am not getting enough of it. I am too much worried that she will not get that much attached with me . Anything I can do about it

Accepted Answer

Building a strong attachment with your baby girl as a father is important for her emotional development and your bond as a family. Here are some ways you can foster attachment with your baby:

1. **Spend Quality Time Together**: Even if you have limited time, make the most of the time you do have with your baby. Engage in activities such as playing, cuddling, and talking to her.

2. **Skin-to-Skin Contact**: Skin-to-skin contact, also known as kangaroo care, is beneficial for bonding. Hold your baby girl against your bare chest to promote feelings of security and closeness.

3. **Be Involved in Caregiving**: Participate in caregiving activities such as feeding, bathing, and diaper changes. These daily routines provide valuable opportunities for bonding with your baby.

4. **Babywearing**: Use a baby carrier or sling to carry your baby girl close to you while you go about your daily activities. This physical closeness can help strengthen your bond.

5. **Engage in Play**: Play is an important way for fathers to interact with their babies and build attachment. Get down on the floor and play games, sing songs, or read stories together.

6. **Respond to Cues**: Pay attention to your baby's cues and respond to her needs promptly. This helps her feel secure and builds trust in your relationship.

7. **Create Special Rituals**: Establish special rituals or routines that you and your baby girl can share, such as a bedtime routine or a morning cuddle session.

8. **Be Patient and Consistent**: Building attachment takes time and consistency. Be patient and continue to be present and involved in your baby's life.

9. **Seek Support**: If you're feeling unsure or overwhelmed, don't hesitate to seek support from your partner, family members, or friends. Parenting is a team effort, and it's okay to ask for help when you need it.

Remember that the quality of your interactions with your baby is more important than the quantity of time spent together. By being present, responsive, and loving, you can foster a strong attachment with your baby girl as a father.