#asktheexpert My daughter is now one year and eight months old. She was born premature. Sir she pulls my hair in anger. slap on my face. how can i handle her.she is so agressive sometimes.

Question

#asktheexpert My daughter is now one year and eight months old.  She was born premature.  Sir she pulls my  hair in anger.  slap on my face. how can i handle her.she is so agressive sometimes.

Accepted Answer

Aggressive behaviors in toddlers, such as hair-pulling, can be challenging but are often a normal part of their development. Here are some strategies to help manage and reduce this behavior:

1. **Stay Calm:**
   - Stay calm and composed when addressing the behavior. Reacting strongly may inadvertently reinforce the behavior.

2. **Provide Alternatives:**
   - Offer alternative activities or objects for your toddler to focus on. Redirect their attention to something appropriate when you notice the hair-pulling behavior.

3. **Teach Gentle Touch:**
   - Use gentle touch yourself to demonstrate appropriate behavior. Show your child how to interact without being aggressive.

4. **Use Positive Reinforcement:**
   - Praise and positively reinforce good behavior. When your child is playing nicely or being gentle, provide positive feedback.

5. **Set Clear Boundaries:**
   - Set clear and consistent boundaries. Let your child know that hair-pulling is not acceptable and explain why in simple terms.

6. **Be Consistent:**
   - Consistency is key. Be consistent in your response to the behavior so that your child understands the expectations.

7. **Supervise Interactions:**
   - Supervise interactions with other children to ensure a positive and safe environment. Intervene if you notice aggressive behavior.

8. **Teach Communication:**
   - Encourage your child to express their needs or frustrations verbally. Teach them simple words or gestures to communicate instead of resorting to aggression.

9. **Provide Positive Outlets:**
   - Ensure your child has opportunities for physical activity and play. Channeling energy into positive outlets can help reduce aggressive behavior.

10. **Offer Comfort:**
    - If your child seems upset or frustrated, offer comfort and try to identify the underlying cause of their distress.

11. **Model Appropriate Behavior:**
    - Children often learn by observing. Model appropriate behavior in your interactions with others.

12. **Consult with a Professional:**
    - If aggressive behaviors persist or escalate, consider seeking guidance from a pediatrician, child psychologist, or behavioral specialist.

It's important to remember that toddlers are still learning to navigate and express their emotions. Patience, consistency, and positive reinforcement can contribute to the development of more appropriate behaviors over time. If you have concerns about your child's behavior, consulting with a professional can provide personalized advice based on your child's specific situation.