Living with in-laws after marriage is a custom that Indian women have to follow even today! While it may work out well for some women, there are plenty of issues that may arise. Sometimes it is difficult to find privacy & your personal space in a joint family. What do you think? Share your views on it.
1.there is no space for your personal life and opinion.
2.Mental health is affected
3. You can't live freely
4. Cant do the things we use to do when live separate
5.Most annoying is back stabbing
6. cant buy the things with freedom,we need to tell them we are buying this that and have to show them
7. can't eat together
8. Cant take care of child properly
9. before speaking we need to make sure it wont hurt them(In short keep quite)
10.most important thing is mental health which is most affected and there is no peace
and From here, worst things start.
Your husband won't be yours now. he will take side of his parents, blindly, during any arguments.
you have to share everything with your in laws. Your time, your energy, your home, your husband and offcourse your own baby.
They will show their full right on everything and everyone. but, they won't consider you as their own. They won't even consider you as a human being.
They will do nothing at home, sit ideally and just want to play with your child and will expect from you to do household chores (yes offcourse, after you come from office).
you don't have any right to raise your baby by your own way. they will try to raise your baby by their way and will always point out mistakes saying this should not be done, that should not be done.
they will do it in a manner that one day your husband will also come to you and will say you are not a good mother at all.
they will interfere in all your deeds and will hide everything from you which is related to their daughters and relatives and everyone around them.
You don't have any privacy.
wherever you go, you have to inform them. but, wherever they will go, they won't feel necessary to inform you.
When you take your baby to your room, they will say about you that she is always sitting in her room and not getting mixed up with them. So, you start sitting with them, and they will only play with your baby and talk with your husband. you just have to sit there, give your baby to them and show everyone your smile. You have to say 'yes' in whatever they say. you don't have to argue on anything. if you do, you are not a 'Sanskari'.
all these and many more adjustments. still your husband would say one day that what are you doing exactly for him and his parents, if you are loving him. you are not always ready to sacrifice.
Many a times you think what is the purpose of living with in laws. they dont love you, they dont respect you. they dont consider u their family, they wont even consider you a good human being. all these things, slowly, over the period of time, your husband would also start to say to you. your relationship with your husband gets ruined. your baby was also always with them. in your own home, you are like outsider. they live like a team who meet often secretely (behind you) and agenda of the meeting is what this girl did and what not. what she was supposed to do (as per them) and what she did not do. they discuss and your husband nods them in agreement and after 2, 3 days or so, he will fight with you with all those points, which he has been taught from them.
now, can please anyone tell me, what is the purpose of living with in-laws. your home is not your home, your hsuband is not your own, your baby is also their's.
you cant live separately from your husband, bcz again so called society will throw arguments on you and will blame you that you couldnt adjusted with them. You also cant live with them together, bcz they will always treat you as an outsider. you have been stuck in a web from where you cannot come outside. can never come. you are stuck there forever.