It’s the Money, Honey! What Happens When you Outearn Hubby

By Mrunal - Updated: November 2, 2018

In this Article

Dealing with the Situation When Women Outearn Men

Thanks to social stereotypes, the wife earning more than husband can lead to bitter power dynamics between the couple. Lady, you are challenging your traditional feminine role! It can be difficult to maintain a healthy balance in the family with this new transition.

Men and women are typically said to be happier in marriages with an Alpha man and a homemaker wife. But what if these roles are challenged and women become the primary earners? In many couples, this brings great turmoil in a relationship, often resulting in splitting up. If you are a female breadwinner, your strange guilt, emotional drain and stress of broken gender role expectations can affect your marriage terribly.

Dealing with the Situation When Women Outearn Men

1. Communication is a must

Engage yourself with your partner emotionally and don’t hesitate to speak your heart rather than harbouring pent-up emotions. Your man may not be the ‘head of household’ financially but it is only with his help that you can build a strong foundation for your marriage. Take time out to enjoy each other’s company to the fullest. ||

2. Discuss your roles

Discuss with your partner the roles and responsibilities in your relationship, right from decision-making to finances and domestic chores. Men may feel dis-empowered when the lady is the sole or main breadwinner. Don’t let this otherwise peripheral issue occupy centrestage in your relationship and instead work together fairly and equitably.

3. Never let guilt pour in

Traditionally, women were confined to house-hold roles while men supported the family. Today, women are slugging it out in the workplace and this is something to be proud of, not guilty! Female breadwinners often feel let down, dissatisfied, and over burdened. It’s important to let go of guilt and ego clashes to have a happy environment at home.

4. Admire your partner’s contribution

It isn’t easy for your husband to see the shift in earning power. The sense of ‘not being a man’ and not being able to provide may take over him. Being a wife, you need to encourage him and appreciate his efforts to make things work at home. Thank him especially for his babysitting when you are at work. You know this isn’t easy!

5. Keep money out of conversations

Money issues invariably have a negative impact on marriage when wife outearns husband. Well, both of you work hard and crush yourself under the work-load to get your paychecks. Chuck things that distress you and discuss more positive subjects – a vacation, perhaps?

6. Connect with your feminine side

Even though you may outearn your husband, it is unfair if you cannot support your family emotionally. Be a partner rather than a boss to keep a healthy marriage. Every now and then, prepare a mouth-watering dinner or go out with the family. These are also priorities!

In marriage, no matter who is the breadwinner, it’s important to meet each other’s needs emotionally. Despite the traditional norms and gender roles, the attitude towards wife earning more than husband is changing. Men are becoming more flexible and are ready to contribute in household chores and parenting. Believe in your relationship, keep patience and things are sure to work out.

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