The Dos and Don'ts of Sex After Pregnancy

Sex After Delivery – How Long to Wait?

Pregnancy is a stage where the body undergoes a lot of changes. It takes some time to recover once the baby has been delivered. Until the body has fully recovered after delivery, the new mother needs to take special care of herself. It should be ensured that any activity that involves stress and takes a lot of energy on the part of the mother should only be performed after consultation with the doctor. One such activity is sex after pregnancy.

If you’ve recently delivered a baby, sex will be the last thing on your mind. But at some point in the postpartum period, you are likely to ponder about sex after childbirth and it won’t be easy to picture because you be sore and tired after delivering the baby and playing the role of a new mother.

Video : Sex After Delivery – How Long to Wait and What to Expect

When Is It Safe to Resume Sex After Delivery?

A couple getting intimate in bed

It is important to understand that a woman’s body is fragile post-delivery and needs extreme care. It is not safe to have intercourse until at least two weeks have passed after delivery, as the chances of uterine infection or haemorrhage are very high during this period. Doctors recommend waiting for at least four weeks before having sex after delivery. This time frame increases to six months if you have fresh stitches as a result of delivery by C-section or due to any other surgery.

Consult your doctor on when to have sex after the baby for the most accurate timeframe.

When Will You Feel Like Having Sex After Baby?

The first four to six weeks after pregnancy is a time period where a woman’s body is recovering from the stress and exhaustion of pregnancy and delivery. If you have recently delivered a baby, you will have low libido levels during this period. Moreover, post-delivery your priority is to nurse the baby and take good care of their health. So naturally, sex is bound to take a back seat.

Further, the natural lubrication of the vagina is low after delivery due to the decrease in oestrogen levels, and the dryness may continue as long as you are breastfeeding the baby.

The urge to have sex may not return instantly. Most partners start having sex after 2 months of delivery.

Why You May Not Feel Like Having Sex After Giving Birth

There can be multiple reasons for this. To start with, you may be too stressed and low on energy to think about having sex.

The responsibility of managing the baby in the first few weeks might leave no room for sex. The feeling of being less attractive and unsettled in your changing body can lower your confidence and discourage you from getting intimate with your partner.

Baby blues or postpartum depression can also keep you prevent you from having sex after giving birth.

What to Do If Your Partner Wants Sex Before You Do?

It might only be normal for your partner to want sex after childbirth. It might be their way of showing love and affection towards you. However, it is important for you to take stock of your condition and talk to your partner about how you are coping with the post-pregnancy effects. Explain to him why your body is not yet ready for sex.

It is necessary to have clear communication and mutual understanding in order to keep the love in your relationship alive.

What Can You Do to Boost Your Sex Drive?

Firstly, it is important to allow your body to recover before resuming your sex life. Partners who look to have sex post-childbirth should do it with each other’s consensus.

Try and identify a time in the day where the two of you are least worn out and have the energy to engage each other. The first few sessions should be gentle, and you should opt for a position where the woman is in control of the depth of penetration and its pace.

Having a healthy diet with plenty of fluids and taking good rest along with mild physical exercises will help your body to recover fast.

Postpartum Sex Tips

Following are tips to enhance your sex appetite post-delivery:

  • Have a talk with your partner on when to restart with sex routine.
  • Start gently. Make it as comfortable as you can so that your inhibitions about pain from sex evaporate.
  • Eat healthily. Have plenty of fluids and perform light physical exercises to bring your body back into shape.
  • It is a good idea to allow your parents to do babysitting so that you get some free time with your partner.
  • Match the timing of sex with the sleeping time of your baby. This will ensure that you are not disturbed.
  • Engaging in some foreplay can help you arouse completely. You can even use lubricants to ensure that the dryness of the vagina does not become a hindrance.
  • Before having sex, explore your vagina gently with your fingers. This will help you identify the pleasure and pain points beforehand.
  • Avoid full penetration in the beginning. Explore positions that limit penetration.
  • Talk to your partner about how you would like to go about the whole thing, especially the first time. Inform him of how you would like to be touched.
  • Consult your doctor and friends who have gone through this stage. They will be able to give you good advice.

What About Birth Control Methods?

Having unprotected sex immediately after childbirth can increase the chances of getting pregnant multifold. To start off with, do not forget to use condoms every time you have sex.

There are contraceptive pills available that can reduce the risk of pregnancy without affecting your hormones and breastfeeding cycles. It is, however, recommended to avoid any such contraceptives unless you’re taking it after consulting with your doctor and understand the possible side effects of the same.

You can also consider going for the medium to long-term birth control measures such as the use of intrauterine devices.

There are numerous other birth control measures available. It is best to consult your doctor and opt for the most suitable and least risky method of birth control.

Problems You Need to Look Out For

1. Your Partner Wants Sex, But You Do Not.

Even after a substantial period of time has passed, you might not be keen on having sex, while your partner must be eager and waiting.

Try These Tips: 

Talk to your partner about your challenges to have sex. Tell him that you will soon be ready for it. You can try cuddling, kissing or playing together with your baby to keep the romance alive.

2. It’s Difficult for You to Wait for Six Weeks to Have Sex and You Want to Go At It Immediately.

In some cases, the craving for post-delivery sex might make it impossible for you to wait for four to six weeks, especially if you have had too less of it during pregnancy.

Try These Tips: 

Consult with your doctor on whether it would be safe to have intercourse after pregnancy. It should be ok if the postpartum bleeding has stopped but you must engage in sex with your partner only after you have confirmed with your doctor about the same.

3. Your Breasts are Leaky and Hurt Due to Tenderness.

Breasts at the time of nursing can become sore and heavy and may not assist in orgasms during sex. Moreover, you might want to let them be after having your baby at it all day.

Try These Tips: 

Nursing your baby right before sex can make it less full and solve the problem of leaking. You can also try wearing a nursing bra or tank top during sex if you feel comfortable in them.

4. It Is Painful to Have Sex.

Soreness due to childbirth and vaginal dryness due to hormonal changes and breastfeeding can make post-pregnancy sex painful.

Try These Tips: 

Give the soreness some time to heal, especially if it arising from C-section surgery. Having a water-based lubricant handy is a good idea.

5. You Feel Conscious About Your Changed Body.

It might take some time before your body can return to its pre-pregnancy shape and the stretch marks may further make you feel conscious about yourself and make you hesitant to have sex with your partner.

Try These Tips: 

Your beautiful baby is a result of all that your body has gone through. It is a natural process, and the body will regain its shape in a matter of time. Your partner is as proud of you as you yourself are. There is no need to be ashamed or conscious of your body.

The body needs dedicated attention and nourishment after delivery, and so does the baby. Sex and intimacy may fall out as priorities from the life of couples for various reasons. However, it is important to keep faith in each other and slowly start building up intimacy as things begin to settle.

Also Read:

Sex Positions to Get Pregnant
Sex Positions During Pregnancy
Sex Drive During Pregnancy

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