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As loving as your relationship with hubby may be (touchwood!), trouble may sometimes creep into paradise. This is more likely if you are the kind of woman who grown up on her dose of rom-com’s and expect your love life to be straight out of a romance novel!
Showing these myths the door will ensure you have a more realistic shot at ‘happily ever after’.
If you place your trust in relationship myths, you and your partner could be headed for disaster. It’s wise to stay grounded and be realistic to enjoy everything marriage has to offer. Just like life has its ups and downs, relationships too have theirs and the sooner you realise it, the better!
10 Relationship Myths You NEED to Trash RIGHT NOW
Even the most perfect seeming couples have issues, what goes on behind their perfect closed doors, nobody knows! Before you let yourself enter a world of unrealistic expectations and heartbreak, here are 9 common misconceptions about relationships that you need to chuck out of your life for good!
1. Love will last forever
The beautiful wedding, the shared laughs and eventually, children—those are just some of the highlights of marriage. However, the love between you and your partner can hit rough patches from time to time. When you accept that there’s a chance your relationship could hit a stumbling block, it can motivate you to work harder to keep your marriage alive. Short vacations, more alone time and regular dates can keep the spice alive.
2. Jealousy means you care
While sometimes it may be cute when your partner gets a little jealous, it doesn’t always mean caring; in fact, an overly-possessive partner can soon get on your nerves! If your partner experiences pangs of jealousy when you don’t give any cause to, he needs to make an effort to change. This goes for you too. If unchecked, jealousy can lead to disastrous fights and push the two of you apart. Mind games and trying to make your partner jealous could also backfire so beware!
3. Fights break a relationship
One of the most common relationship myths and facts is that fights can ruin a relationship. This couldn’t be farther from the truth. In fact, the occasional fight can actually bring you closer. Now, not resolving issues is what can deepen resentment and split you up!
4. A child ensures a happy marriage
How many times have you heard this: “children can solve marital problems”? Utter hogwash! In fact, studies have shown that for some couples, the challenges that arise – both physically and financially – can weaken the bond even more. What you and your husband should do is talk about the changes that are bound to take place after a baby arrives. When you know what you’re getting into, it will be easier to handle.
5. Love will save the day
No, love doesn’t always conquer all. It may not stop you from looking past your partner’s flaws. Make sure you take time out for date nights, appreciate your partner for all he does for you and strive to resolve disputes. One of the biggest myths about relationships is that if you love each other to bits, the small stuff can be taken for granted. This is just what we called it – a big MYTH!
6. Couples should have sex X times a month/week/day
Says who? As long as your husband and you are in a healthy, loving relationship, the frequency of sex depends entirely on the two of you. If you are having sex less than some of your friends and are completely happy, that’s fine. In fact, comparing and measuring amongst friends can be misleading and lead to problems that didn’t exist before. However, sex does open up doors to intimacy and can sometimes be what you need during a tiring week.
7. A Happy Couple Need Only Each Other and No One Else
A lot of couples assume that if love is true then it’s all the other needs. The truth it, while it is a great feeling to be each others’ best friend, friendships outside of your relationship hold great value too. Your friends and family can offer support and good times when your partner is not available. A good support system is as important as the strong bond you have with your partner.
8. Do NOT Go to Bed Angry
True, crying yourself to sleep is the worst feeling ever. But sometimes, it is better to sleep on a problem than try and resolve it past midnight. At the end of a long day, tiredness and anger may lead you to say nasty stuff to each other. Rest and talk it out with a fresh mind in the morning. Who knows, a sneaky midnight cuddle may even cause you to forget the anger!
9. Love should be easy
A lot of times, especially during a rough patch we find ourselves thinking, “Is this worth the struggle? Shouldn’t love be effortless?”. We’re here to tell you, yes love is worth the struggle and no love is not always easy breezy? In fact, loving someone is hard work. It means being patient, understanding, accepting and nurturing even in times you’d rather not. In return, you get the same deal and a whole lot of hugs and support for life! Not a bad deal, eh?
10. “He Should Know Why I’m Upset, Does He Even Care?”
No, men are not mind-readers. Neither are you! So, why base your logic according to perfectly scripted characters from fictional fairy-tales? Your partner is human. And real people may notice the other is upset but do not expect him to know exactly what expression, word or careless action that came from him, a stranger or some random dream you had has caused you to be upset. Tell him what it is and enjoy the attention he gives you while trying to make the love of his life happy again!
Remember, there are no perfect relationships, only REAL ones. Real ones full of learning together, growing together and choosing each other no matter how tough the road gets. Switch off that unrealistic version of love flashing on your TV screen or grab some popcorn and laugh together about how your love story is WAY better than that!